not to be one of those people who write depressing poetry and submit it to spectator with high hopes...but

here goes:

when your parents stop waiting up for you
and your bicycle rusts
and your mouth leaves lipstick rings on half-smoked cigarettes
thrown behind you
the sound it makes when you put it out
the sizzle on pavement
the grinding of your worn-in heels
your mouth tastes like
lemonade stands
youth sold for
25 cents a glass
on street corners

Sketchy.

Green.

Okay, on the advice of Jason Nellis, I am taking the initiative to restart Wally. Obviously I must begin with a synopsis, because many people do not know where Liz and I exactly are.

Liz is still dating Don (against my advice for her to run away to South America with a Brazilian Soap Star named Diego), and we're all disgusted by their displays of romantic affection, only because we envy them (well, except me, I have Diego).

I'm diligently working on my Senior Project of writing a film curriculum.

Liz is still going to California. I'm still going to Europe.

Liz is a dancer in Kiss Me, Kate, whereas I am simply the Student Assistant Director, Assistant Set Designer and the Set Decorator. The main difference is that I have a script.

After going to the New York Trip with Walter Johnson S*T*A*G*E, I came the epiphinatic conclusion that the guy I was dating at the time was self-centered and just overallfully wrong for me. Then we broke up.

About a week later I was in a car accident. I was fine, in fact, not even really at fault- which is good. But then I got home and I went crazy, so now I'm on this great new medication (which I haven't been on since last January).

I'm still wearing green, Liz still hates it.

GREEN.

lalalalaaa!! i went singing christmas songs today in school!! yay! i said that only because i can't spell carroling...or it might be carolling. not sure. anyway......
i love singing!!!!!!!
yay!!

oh dear. lots of math homework.
my days are bleeding together.....they are just all....my life. things i want to leave behind. memories i don't intend to keep, and experiences i don't intend to share. my life is the same as my dreams.....everything bleeds together......until it's one gigantic bloody mess....
like paint....
it runs together unless there's something to stop it.
i haven't found anything to block my days from all being the same.
oh my.
im not sad though. im actually quite happy!
hehee..
people mistake my thinking for being depressed...
im just thinking.
and being happy.
silly thoughts.

well......my nana's here...my dad went and got her from new jersey. it turns out she's sick too.......
everyone's sick.
so i moved into my basement.
that's all i really wanted to say. that im not in my room anymore...
lalalalalaaa!
i can't wait until kiss me kate.
the one acts are making me sad.

well. i did end up going to jared's play....and the sadie hawkins dance was cancelled......so for someone who's "grounded" i got off pretty easy.
yesterday, i didn't live my life. we had school, sure, that's never the highlight of my day, but after school, gabe, ryan, lauren ulf and i all went to see brittany ross (someone gabe, ryan, and i went to middle school with at green acres) at the hospital. she was diagnosed with lukemia on thursday and has been in the hospital since tuesday. i went to the hospital with the intention of not talking....just letting gabe and ryan talk, because i can always count on them for that. but we were only allowed to go in 2 at a time, and naturally gabe and ryan went in together. which meant that lauren and i would have to go in there, with nothing to say. i had to make conversation. i felt like i was going to throw up. i hate hospitals. sure, they do a lot of good...but i just associate it with lots of suffering. i shouldn't. im optimistic for brittany, because the doctors know what they're doing, and they caught it early. i should stop complaining, though, because however much i didn't want to be there, she doesn't want to be there 100 times more. yeah. that's the end of my jumbled thoughts.
silly thoughts.

i got in trouble. my parents didn't know where i was last night. so now im grounded for the weekend. that means jared's play. and it's the last weekend of it. and i promised id go. and that means sadie hawkins. and that means getting together presents for people. sometimes my parents are right. and other times they're just completely unreasonable. silly parents.

what's it like to actually be alive? to be present? aren't we always present anyway? well, no. not really. fact is we are usually half asleep and our brains are full of bits and pieces of desire, dream, delirium, day's and night's detritus. we are probably responding with less than half of our brains - less than a quarter of our heart fact is, the world's a constant astonishment, a blade of grass yearns toward the sky, a rose drips morning dew, your loved one's face is radiant with love's glow - but who sees such stuff? it's here always, but we're all too busy, too burdened by all we think we have to do, by all we imagine is important, by all we feel we want and need to get. instead of being present, we are tense, worried. we think being present means we have to do something. actually, being present is really about returning, turning around our mind and heart. it may take some work......this kind of work - take a deep breath right now. take a breath. breathe in the whole world. you are alive! breathe out your concerns. let everything go. what you lack, what you want, breathe it out. feel what it's like to be naked and completely vulnerable. i suppose that's being present. an active participant in your own life, instead of watching it happen like a movie. recognize that you are alive. that's what calmness and comfortability is about. recognizing your life. and a love of life. what an intriguing thing. to live.
sigh.

gosh im happy.

i always put myself in really awkward situations. im always somewhere i don't want to be, but i keep talling myself that i can handle it truly responsibly and then i keep asking myself "how do i get out of here," "why am i here?" "why do i live like this?"
so it makes me wonder.
am i just hypersensitive? because i've become slightly uncomfortable around certain people. is there a reason for me to question all this? or am i just being a jewish mother....
oh well.

i was thinking of doing something for the coffee house on friday. i don't do anything, though. i could sing something, but it wouldn't be my song...and then i wouldn't be doing justice to the writers...
and i could write something, but it would be bad. yeah well...im trying to learn how to play a song on the piano for it....we'll see how it goes. i seem outgoing...but i'll be really scared if i go up there...you seem so vulnerable to critique. so anyway...im gonna go eat.

i have a lot of math homework. sure. everyone has homework. and of course i don't have the most of anyone anywhere....but to each individual person it seems like a big deal. ever wonder why that is? why everyone thinks one small moment in their lives matters a whole lot? or even why they think they matter? or why i think i matter? well i don't matter. seriously though, if im so worried about how i look to other people, and how my grades are and what college i go to, and if everyone else is so worried about what they're doing with their lives, then how can they have time to care about me? and since they don't care about me, i should stop worrying what they think. these circles seems so illogical...but they really make sense. you might wonder why im babbling here instead of doing my math...cause i think im invincible and can stay up forever working. but the truth is, that the tireder i get, the harder it is...so im gonna work now

hello again. im just trying to post things...so no one else can read it...so i can just talk to myself. but anyway. i have a friend i've known for a long time. who doesn't go to wj. but he's my really good friend. and i talk to him almost every day. but recently, he's become really passive agressive, and has become really close friends with one of my closest friends. he makes me feel like im second priority in his life, and my other friend's life. im wondering if im seeing this situation as me just wanting more attention...or if he's really not being nice. he's done this kind of stuff to me before. and i always promised myself that i wouldn't worry about petty problems between friends, cause everyone lives and dies whether they keep certain friends or not. but my questions about his friendship never get answered no matter how much i analyze myself. so im really telling this to myself. because only sane people talk to themselves.
im wondering if i should just leave the situation alone, but im growing increasingly uncomfortable around him, and he's becoming more and more close to me and my other good friend. when you've had a friend for long enough, you become vulnerable to whatever they think of you, and i don't want his opinions or the way he acts to change who i am, or the relationships i have with others. i don't want to be paranoid. and i don't want to be harsh. but i want stable friends who care about me and who i care about. i had a theory a long time ago that stable people attract needy people. and i am under the impression that im not stable enough for my friend to cling on to me...
because i refuse to be someone's entrance into reality. and the real world isn't so accepting of someone who's mean, and who doesn't care about other people. im truly not angry. but i wish i could be comfortable around one of my closest friend. the end.

i feel really depressed and passive...that's bad.
oh well.

so ive started up again....i thought id post stuff on here for a while..and publish it if i ever get up the motivation to..
but this will serve as my diary for some time, and ill just keep talking like there's someone there.
so my life is pretty boring and habitual. i suppose everyone else's is too. i wish i had a surprise each morning. and a real exciting reason to jump out of bed. i look forward to school only because i see my friends (i don't have many friends) and stage. i love stage. (there are one act auditions tomorrow) but my life is basically useless. i don't know if he meant to write it that way, but dave mathews has a song called ants marching. and the first time i heard it, i couldn't catch the word but the title kinda got me thinking. you could interpret the title as having the same pointless life, and trying to give your own life a purpose. that's why people have religion. to give themselves security. to tell them that their lives aren't for nothing. that they are a servant of god. whether you (or i) believe in god or not, people are pointless. and one individual person is very little. i have conflicting views on this, too. because i have always been taught that i can make a difference. and whenever i tell someone that i feel that people are worthless, they automatically defend themselves with the facts that they had people who cared about them, so they mattered, and that they believe that they can still make a difference and change the world. even if someone did change the views or practices of people, or if they truly "made a difference" it still doesn't matter. if you imagine a huge timeline, america is in the last tiny portion of the line, and no matter what one person does, the world will keep turning. people are consumers. not producers. they destroy the area around them. they don't contribute to it. no matter what people will tell themselves, they aren't significant. but no one can live with that. no one ive met can truly stop and think if they are really important. because if they did think, for a long time, they would realize that humans are not significant to the world around them.

stage is cool

allow me to throw my random thoughts at you (i was thinking last night staring up at the ceiling from my bed)
this is kinda what i was thinking about
who am i? am i significant in any way? am i just as pointless as any other organism in the world? where do i come from? yes. adam and eve. the big bang. theories of the world's creation. but where do people come from and why? will they leave in the same way they came? don't you think it's ironic that people have named people the most intelligent beings in the world? if we don't even know our own significance, how can we justify it by saying we are more significant than anyone else?why do we feel the need to make answers for ourselves? in stories of gods and higher beings? is it truly insecurity?
am i crazy for waking up so early to babble about random things?
i just wanted to know if anyone else thought about this stuff...or if im just crazy.
let me tell you (whoever you are, because im convinced no one reads this) that im not cynical or depressed. im looking at reality and picking it apart. because there is always more to ask. and don't worry. i'll keep asking you annoying questions. so someone stop me and have a conversation with me about this stuff...because at the moment it seems im talking to myself.
ok then. off to walk my dog.

So- last night, I bought a Pikachu balloon and enough fruit snacks to feed Canada. And oh my god- Brian came to the show. Here's the 411 on Bri- he's a really nice guy, and when we were dating, it was awesome. I broke up with him for some very crucial reasons. First, he's just coming out, which makes everything very awkward, 'cause he's not comfortable with himself yet. Second, he lived in Gaithersburg, which is 25 minutes away. And he cannot drive. Third, he will not come out of the closet, which bugs me major, 'cause then everything we do is in private. Finally, he's very religous, and I believe still thinks being gay is a sin. But- he really wants to get back together. And that concerns me, it really does. I am not opposed to him in anyway, he's still a nice guy, but it can't happen.

Yeah- that was kind of old. Alex has gotten her lines better, and I think I did pretty dern well myself. So in conclusion, let's go out there and dance the night away. Opening night was really cool, but let's do second night one notch better.

and now to interrupt this broadcast, a friendly message from S*T*A*G*E 's favortie goofball:

Jason:

Hey, this is Jason. You know, Jason... You mean you don't know who I am?!
sniffle...

I'm hurt...

No, I'm not THAT Jason! He had a hockey mask! Dangit! Oh well. Anyway, Liz asked me to write a guest blog. So here's what I have to say: I really, really, REALLY detested the first run we did today of the show. It was very very not good. As opposed to kinda not bad. One thing- Everyone, myself included, but Caitlin Brodnick excluded, should review their lines more. Listening to a certain person who shall remain nameless (she's the only not-blind woman in 1:1) butcher the lines was pretty bad. Then listening to myself screw up 1:3 was even better. Anyway, I shouldn't mention names (Liz) even though certain (Liz) people don't even have (Liz) lines, it's just (Liz) entertaining to keep (Liz) repeating their (Liz) names.
Well, that's all I have to say. Adios!
note: this was written a couple days ago...so references to the play are probably really outdated. thank you!

Sung to the tune "I Want it That Way" by The Backstreet Boys:

She's our ... Director,
Like a ... Dictator,
I'm scared, when they say-
I didn't do it Ms. Mac's way.

I'm gonna cry-y.
I almost missed the opening line,
I'm gonna die-y.
Stop saying it'll be just fine,
Need to lie,
I never heard Don sa-ay,
That she wanted it her way.

Now I can feel that we're all gonna fail,
From the tone of her God-like voice. Yeah-ah.
"Raise up the house lights," she sees us all there,
And deep down inside we freeze.

She's our ... Director,
Not a ... Prodcuer,
She is, she is, she is.
She wants it her way.

yay! we have a couch now!
and yes. i hope gore wins the election. i don't want to move to a random country. or maybe i do...who's up for a 4 year long tour of europe?!?! whoa...that'd be so cool.
yes well. we get wait until dark t-shirts tomorrow! and they'll be pretty!
yes. (i say yes a lot) well im tired. and im going to sleep through whoever becomes president! so...off to dream about the props working tomorrow...and not having ms. mac yell at me and elyse. ok. goodnight.

There's a fairy who hides in my garden!

Well, the show opens soon, I'm getting kind of nervous, but mostly because I'm sick, but I finally go tthe loveseat. It was quite HUE-morris. They were like, "500 dollars, I can't let it go for anything less than that."
"But, it has a tear in it."
"Okay, fine 475."
"But, I really need it, really."
"Uhm- well, 450."
"Please? It's for a show, I can't go back without it."
"Okay, 400, but no less."
"I really need it. I'm just a poor innocent youth."
"Ugh- 350!"
"SOLD!"

It was funny, but the guy was really nice and I got my money's worth. Nothing more much to BLOG (that sounded strange). No school tomorrow, even though we have rehersal all day. I hope we get home in time to see the results of the election. I've already found a nice cozy green shack in Canada... just in case.

Okay, this weekend was the cast sleepover at my house. I had never before realized what a complete jerk I can actually be. I'm proud. Hubris. That's Greek pride. The sleepover was fun, and we bonded, but it was weird, because I was really exhausted. We'll get to why in just a moment.
burnout (burn'out'), n. the termination of effective combustion in a rocket engine, due to exhaustion of propellent.
I feel that I may currently be suffering from massive burnout. At one point of time I was a force to be reckoned with. David C. Muma of the National Campaign Against Youth Violence, who was on the warpath to end war and who would kill for everyone to stop homicide. But now, S*T*A*G*E has taken a complete control over my life. I have so much to do that I didn't as much as for. This has sparked, what I think, is my burnout.
Now, let's talk about Gregor, the person whose house (in Virginia) that I woke up in Saturday morning. Well, Gregor is attarctive and though the prospective multiple hookups that was offered sounds appealing, I want to pass. He's just really heavy into a relationship, that I'm unto recently realizing that I'm not all about right now. I mean, yay for finding the right person, but I'm going away for college, whether it's Texas or Taiwan- and if the right person is here (or rather, in Virginia) then fate is just sick and twisted. One thing about Gregor though, he sure does like movies.

WJ S*T*A*G*E is really cool. jason made this. it's gonna be great!

so i'm pretty tired. today was another episode of "liz trying to be responsible in stage" today's thrilling drama was entitled "david and liz go shopping for furniture for the fall play" so yes. other than the fact that david is color blind and so i was basically responsible for having the couch match the painted background and there was huge amounts of traffic, we made some progress. we decided where not to go for furniture shopping. don't go to sears. we still have to go to a bunch of places...because as you've probably already guessed...we don't have the furniture yet. but i did survive dealing with props today! and elise called me and worked a bunch of stuff out with me!! so yay! (yes jason, it turns out there might actually be a geraldine after all) and we might have it tomorrow!! so to conclude, i haven't blogged because i've been running around..so this is my relaxing time...saturday night...makes ya wonder. anyhow, i'm going to go eat something and maybe do some homework..and sleep some. so goodnight!

4703 is a number I must remember. Dpaez79 - Remember that too.

so anyway...i tried to make a grilled cheese sandwich, but i walked away from it and since i have a pretty short attention span, i almost burned my kitchen down...but that's ok cause i'm eating ice cream instead. mint chocolate chip.
did you know that if you rearrange the letters in "president clinton of the usa"
that you can make "to copulate he finds interns"
pretty interesting, huh?
yeah, and if you rearrange "desperation"
you get "a rope ends it"
and "the morse code" turns out to be
"here come dots"
hehee...alright, off to write some government papers..

today the point was brought up that the coffee house had too many people in it, and had "lost the feel of the more intimate coffee houses"
now that's all fine and good, but i think the bottom line is, nobody has the right to exclude people from a coffee house, and while it did have like 60 people, i think that if 60 need a place to read some poetry, or hear some, or sing some music, or just be out of the house on a friday night and actually thinking and participating in an actual experience and not just a football game...we can't exclude those people. and the fact that it's a fundraiser is besides the point. i had fun. and it was a great experience. i didn't perform anything (cause im silly and not very talented...but i think i've been over this) so i think we should embrace new and old people who show up.....
so that was it.
off to bed.
i almost thought...
david, find those water-wings.

right, so since i'm not capatilizing on the site, i thought i'd try some spacing.
that was a tab. and a enter. so there. maybe now my blog is prettier because it's well spaced. well...maybe not. ok so i'm not making much sense, but i've started to think in spanish, because i just finished a project, and figured out all this stuff. i love spanish. i really like knowing a different language. i wish i did. i kind of knew hebrew, but i forgot so much of it, it doesn't count. and i kinda know sign language...but just some words, the rest i have to spell out, and that takes a while. so all in all...im kind of tired of english. because american people get on my nerves (yes i am american..so this is kind of confusing, but if i get on everyone else's nerves...why not get on my own?)
that's a funny expression "get on your nerves" yeah. i totally jumped right on top of that nerve. right. so im tired, and babbling. but bottom line, thanks david for driving us for t-shirts. and happy halloween. (i'd say it in spanish, but i don't know how)

Okay- I haven't posted any drama on here in a while, but this is semi-related. Two things, one (the more superficial of the two) is, now that I've come to an equalibrium of not needing a guy, or wanting one, a very attractive (older) guy is awaiting. That's tangential, though. The more important one is Kiss Me Kate. I really do want to do something with the show, but I'm not sure if cast is exactly what that something should be. It's making me thing and prioritize and all that.

Yeah Liz, but you must admit, it sure is fun while we watch Spanish soap operas together. I can never quite understand what it is they are saying, but I do catch what their empathetical faces are displaying. They are like: "Armando, mi pene no puede ir ariba!" That means, Armando, me penis can't get up! Well, that was a simple non-sequitor. That's what I've noticed about foreign language. Wrinkles are how they speak to each other. It's pratically recommended that you make yourself into a prune so you can better use Spanish to describe your impudence.

I'm being evil tonight, my porch light is on and I'm not doing anything for these poor trick-o-treaters. What a lame holiday. (I bet you knickers to knack that the three ghosts of Halloween come tonight and haunt me, I'm actually preparing for it, my attacking defense: "you silly-sods, I'll just make you laugh to death by using an English accent.") You know, everything is more interesting when you use a really bad English accent. It's interesting, because people who are English actually have less wrinkly skin, and they sound much cooler than the Spanish prunes that are impudent.

im so cool. yes. relatively maybe somebody out there is cooler than me...but i think im pretty far up there on the cool-o-meter. (when you rate me on the meter, please exclude that i am home for halloween...and doing my math and spanish homework instead of collecting candy or bothering small children) for example, how many people do you know who have heard "i will survive" in spanish?? yes. ladies and gentlemen, ladles and jellyspoons, i heard i will survive in spanish. it was the coolest song!! and that means im cool. yeah. so i didn't end up taking my nap after all, i went and ran errands with ali instead. and we heard that song. it was the coolest thing.
yup.
im pretty cool.

LIZard! Happy Halloween, first of all. Second, you left out an incredibly viable part of your t-shirt odyssey today. Uhm- me! I totally was the key and critical piece that perfected the trip that earned you the gloating right over Rie-- I mean, the general right to gloat about how great you are. I took it upon myself to drive you and Jocelin to the Special Tees place. I totally deserve like 1/8th of your glory.

hi there...i really wanted to blog right now...im not sure why...probably because i don't expect to blog tonight. nobody reads this anyhow i suppose...does anyone read this other than me?? i don't think so, but just incase you do...
we got the t-shirt design in to the company today, so the wait until dark shirts will be ready on wednesday. yes...that's pretty late..actually really late, but im just glad it got done, im not even the crew chief or anything..
so im about to take a nap now...cause im tired
so yeah.
the t-shirts will be so beautiful!!!
byebye!

So- I also have a lot of math homework to do, and it's impugnent upon my success in the class which will hold me up to being successful in going to college. Oh crikey- I have to research somehting, BLOG later.

anh has to write a paper for government class about who she would vote for. so i told her she should "say she's voting for bush to get bad policies on social security, the economy, and abortion, and then move to canada where you can get all that without the funny texan accent and all the pointing."
i'd do that...
i actually do have to write that paper....
that's what it's going to say.

well...to be completely honest (because that gets me farther in society...hehee david) im putting off my spanish. it's a project on jose marti. it's pretty easy..i just say some facts in spanish with a cute little timeline of his life, a couple pictures and "guantanamera" playing in the background. but this is more fun. i also have a math test. but that's on friday. it's on a big packet i haven't finished yet...it's like a 70 page packet. yeah. big. so im putting that off too...im gonna go check some random websites i haven't seen in a while...just to entertain myself...byebye!

New Jersey, Liz? New Jersey? You could have at least warned us all about your trek to the north. I mean, what am I supposed to do, here, stranded, all alone in the wilderness of suburbia? So, I've decided that TomatoMan.com is going to be the next thing in cool websites. I want to buy it so that I can sell it for an outrageous amount of money.

Where has honesty ever gotten anyone, I mean, honestly! Never have I ever been better off being honest than making a well fabricated extension of the truth. "I haven't gotten to it yet" sounds a lot better than, "I'm putting it off". How honest is our society, and -more importantly- how honest does it expect us to be?

oops! i forgot to talk about the coffee house..
it was such a success!! (due to - of course - the fact that anh and i went into a starbucks and "helped ourselves" to quite a number of stirers. so we had authentic coffee house stirers. i think if i had made this known more than about 4 of them would have been used. that 4 does not include the handfull garrett took and proceeded to throw at people)
i've decided i can't do much. i sing, but i don't write my own songs, and i don't play the guitar or piano or anything. so i can't make my own music. and i tried writing poetry, but it's bad. really bad. like there's good poetry and then there's "oh look how sweet, she must have been 5 years old when she wrote that" and the little caption underneath says im 14. no. just bad. right, so in an attempt to make this a short blog, let me end by saying...somebody teach me how to play the guitar..please!! yes. thanks. and make me mix-tapes! and buy me recordings of stand up comedy routines...or books on comedians. cause they're funny. oh right. short blog. the end.

ok, so here i am!! i'm in new jersey, because my nana lives there. it turns out she finally got a computer..but she doesn't know how to use it...(i never thought i'd be teaching something about a computer to anyone else..because im incompetent) so i'm getting my nana a screename!! yay! so you might be wondering (nobody ever wonders about these things...except for me..) why im in new jersey in the first place. well...other than visiting my grandmother...it's my dad's 50th birthday. now maybe i shouldn't be broadcasting that over the internet, considering as how it has been addressed as rude dinner table conversation...but there you have it. he's "old" now...so we all piled into this little tiny car (the white one, david, you've seen how small it is!) i do mean piled, because my mother and i were in the back with kodi (my monsterous animal, who the rest of my family kindly referrs to as a "puppy" ) sitting on top of us. try reading or eating with a dog on your lap. that's all i do on car trips. but since kodi ate more food than i did, and i started to get that "don't keep reading" feeling down in my stomach...i proceeded to stare out the window for a while..and then i made my sister turn off the radio (she was driving..and she was listening to her "pure brittany" meaning brittany spears..mix tape that josh shulteis gave her. for those of you who saw cabaret, he played the emcee) so anyway..i got my whole family singing..like every song we knew. we ran through the score of a bunch of musicals, folk songs, stuff from the radio, everything we could think of. now, you have to know something about my family: we don't eat dinner together. we don't bond. this is our bonding...to my sister it was "younger-sister-inflicted-torture" but my dad and i were putting together some pretty cool harmonies. yeah. so i like singing. but it's very hard when you have a dog that weighs the same as you on your lap...
so look at that...another long blog..maybe my next one will be short and sweet...but you got this far..so congratulations.

Tatorspec. Oops. Anyway, so tonight was the Spectator Coffee House, widely advertised by Jonathon Schnieder. I didn't go, though I did want to. However, someone had to go see Erin's opening night of Victor, Victoria, which was honestly one of the funniest things I have seen in months. So, yes, I did miss the Spectator Coffee House, but hopefully my peers will forgive me (after all, I sold a dozen old Spectators at the Informance last Tuesday. I even missed part of Buffy, the Vampire Slayer. There are a lot of italics in this BLOG, I wonder why.

Wait Until Dark opens in two weeks. Two weeks. It's almost a bit frightening. I mean, it just seems like the time has shot by so quickly. I don't know what I will do with S*T*A*G*E for the rest of the year. For One Acts, Denise, Allison, and I were thinking about writing, directing and producing a paradoy of Dickens, but it has been shot in the leg. And, the Musical, Kiss Me Kate- well, I don't know about that just yet. I did have fun today, I went Prop Shopping with Elyse. She spoke so highly of Liz, it was really cool. You are going to make an awesome props crew chief in the future, Liz.

Haikus are comprised of 5 syllables, 7 syllables, and then 5 again, right? Here is my closing Haiku.

Misty dreams unfold;
Ballroom dancing is a sport;
Eyes close now, to rest.

I'd just like to share that the reason you get so lost in Liz's long BLOG is that she refuses to allow the [Shift] Key of her computer to receive any play. It's getting less play than I am! I mean, I feel that you are simply religously against using th [Shift] Key. Regardless to this misnomatical misnummeration, I would also like to share that I'm looking into attending the University of Northern Texas. Unt. It's like the last for letters of Cunt. Oh dear.

hello there...i haven't written in a while...namely because i was busy writing a 15 page paper on the issues of the presidential campaign that is almost here..
yes well...to make up for the time lost, this just might end up being one of those long blogs...you know...the ones where when you try to read them, you lose your place a couple dozen times and finally give up and stick your finger on the screen hoping to be able to follow this time...but you end up missing the whole point of the blog and dirty up your computer monitor with fingerprints and food stains...
well, if i haven't lost you yet...
i'd just like to rant and rave for a second about my government paper. it was originally assigned about a month ago, and being the typical teenager that i am, i didn't start it until 2 nights before. (actually a typical teenager wouldn't have started it until 12 o'clock in the morning of when the paper was due...im quite studious, don't you think?)
so anyway...this paper that my partner and i spent considerably less than 5 hours time on...and was originally supposed to be 15 pages (ours was 13 and then a bibliography...i hate bibliographies...i'll save that for another blog) just got turned back to us today. let me illustrate for you the experience of getting back a huge paper during first period..which is at exactly 7:25 (for those of you who don't go to high school yourselves, forget this feeling from when you were in high school...or if you aren't jared, who has to wake up at like 4 to go be on the radio...or if you're not "mr. mccord" who is in the process of experiencing high school again, because he loved it so much the first go-around) everyone knows the feeling of having to literally hold your eyelids open at 7:30 in the morning, because sheer will-power won't keep you awake. this was one of those mornings...it wasn't that i hadn't had any sleep, actually i had gotten a whole lot of sleep, because i was sick yesterday and so i slept my way through the afternoon and evening..and night..and early morning...i was just tired. end of story. so being the generous person that i am, i send my partner to go look at our score, while i sit at my desk...trying to find a purpose in staying awake..(if you go to the health room with a pass, you can sleep through a period...or you can go down to the girl's locker room and sleep on the comfy sofa..if i had a car, i wouldn't have to do this..but as some of you know i'm still 14) so anyway...my partner comes back sqealing...which for those of you who haven't mastered the meanings of little noises made by teenage girls, that either means there is a spider within a couple miles, or that they're real happy. now this woke me up (namely because i hate spiders) then she shoved the paper on my desk and i saw our score!! we had gotten a 95%
yayayayayaay!! and that's excitement for you folks..i was so happy. i woke up..and i am still awake, as you can tell...
so the moral of the story? (you might ask..although you probably didn't) always wait until the last two days to write a paper..and then sleep for a really long time once it's done.
suffice it to say (this is how lawyers start most of their sentences, and so i thought i had to put it in here somewhere) this story has no conclusion "like bad movies from london"

Man, when I grow up, I wanna work for Wal-Mart. Doesn't that sound like a fun job? I mean, I've also been thinking about a career in fast food. "Hi, welcome to Taco Bell, may I take your order?" It just sort of rolls off your tongue, don't you think? I mean, I may as well give up now the entire chance of myself going to college, it's simply a complte waste of my time to even try. Dawson's Creek was very good tonight, but I'm beginning to believe that I should just do what Jack does- never date anyone at all. That sounds fun, and simple, doesn't it?

i came home from the renissance festival and i was wearing my big poofy dress, and my family all went out to eat..and i was sitting at the table with my funny dress on asking if the waitress could bring me some crayons...she thought i was some insane person...it was pretty funny..
ya. and i bought a gallon jug of water today so i didn't have to drink out of the mucky water fountain.
yes. incase you're wondering, mucky is a word.

today at the renissance festival...we saw this sign that said "stupid hat area" and i really wanted the sign....oh well...
my foot just fell asleep..
oh yeah, and there was a sign that said "any unattended children will be sold as slaves" that kinda scared me
and there was this little kid that was on a leash. that was disturbing...that kid's gonna need some serious therapy...

Ugh- I am ever so ill, and it is no fun. Everytime I talk I have to like gasp between words. Yuck.

we're not actually gonna meet at my house...SO DON'T COME TO MY HOUSE...cause that'd be sad, cause i'd be gone and you'd come here...yes well...we're not meeting here anymore.. goodnight..hehee

i posted the ren fest message twice, so instead of letting it go to the website, im putting this message here instead. yes well.. everyone come to the ren fest!! ok bye.

to the wj stagies: if you are going to the renissance festival tomorrow (the 22), then meet at my house at 11:00 in the morning. if we all get there by then, we'll probably leave by 11:30. i'll have directions to the fair and all that good stuff. we'll be mainly outside my house...so if you think you'll have to go inside for any reason, you won't be able to. hahaha! no one will be in my house. yes. well.
oh yes! if you don't know where my house is, it's off tilden lane. you turn on right on danville and my house is the second green shack on the right. so yeah. and email me if you want to tell me that you're going. ok then. i hope everyone will come!! see you there!

today i wasnt so happy, so i made a samich, and i put mustard on it, and i put the mustard in the shape of a smiley face on my bread. then i ate it. and now im happier. yay!

Liz is here. Right now, as we speak, as I type, Liz is right here doing some mindless English assignment. However, soon I must take her home, so my time with you all is incredibly brief. The point of this BLOG is merely to identify that Liz and I hung out a lot today. We almost got in a car accident, but then we watched Dawson's Creek! We also went shopping while my car was getting fixed and we bought MONKEY SOCKS. (that should be rainbow, but not enough time, I'll take a picture later.

hi there, im in the media center...meredith is sitting next to me...everyone say hi! hi meredith. anyway, im supposed to be researching tobacco for heath class. this is the most supidest...(grammar check much?) class ever...it has no point. so im on here instead. heheheee...im in the library. this is such an old computer...anyway, maybe ill go work, but byebye for now!!
oh yeah..and david, i have a couple of good icebreakers...
so yes. off to research tobacco...maybe.

Well- hello everyone. No doubt you've missed me because it has been some time since BLOGification has occurred. Liz has been doing a very good job, but now it is time for my really long BLOG to occur.

This weekend I went to Memphis, Tennesse. I ate a lot of BBQ Pork. Everyone in Memphis eats BBQ, not bar-b-que, but BBQ, notice the essential difference. I got a chance to hang out with MAGY (Memphis Area Gay Youth) and it kinda made me think, but then I realized that thinking was an overrating activity. Then I spoke to 900 young people (mostly black) about how I had changed from a racist bigot to a now wonderful activist. Then I sat in my hotel and did a flirping research paper.

But, while I was in Memphis, Liz ran out an bought a cowboy hat. That hat will be hereby known as the hat of doom. Whereas, the much nicer denim hat I purchased from Memphis is official our hat. Liz and I share a lot of stuff. It is our stuff, really.

Last night I went to Reel Affirmations, the Gay and Lesbian Film Festival. This guy I went with asked me on a date. He writes, "Ok, I wanted to see, of course you can say no. I would so understand. "No" its an ok answer I mean, I was a butch mean guy, jerk, unpolite... rude,,, dummb...etc... . But I would like it very much if you said "yes" ***Would, you like to, go on a date with me??*** That was so hard.. I am relax, yeah.. meditating.. huhmmm huhmmm huhmmm.." Ah, e-mail, savior of our times. What do we say, take or just ehn?

So- today, I was driving and my tire blew! I had a dead tire. So, being the farm boy I was, I replaced the damn thing, but I was really worried because the spare tire is deffinetly 4 sizes too small. I was massively panick ridden, but now it's all good.

Liz, you wanna come over for Buffy? (You know you do!) We should deffinetly go to Renaissance Festival as like weird people, in costumes. That would be so cool!

so we took the PSAT's this morning. it's really evil..because they make you use one half of your brian for 25 minutes in the verbal part, and then they switch to math...and then back to verbal....that means both sides of my poor little brain have to work early in the morning. and so there's this part where you have to fill out your religion..and i put down "southern baptist"
hehee...

hey, wj stagies...come to the ren fest on sun. the 22. it'll be fun...don't let garrett buy a sword. we were gonna go on the 21..but WE'RE NOT ANYMORE. come the 22. yes. the end.
oooh! and come canoing. (probably not spelled right) hehee...byebye then!

carrot juice is murder
this is kinda odd...it's a whoa there if i ever saw one...

"He reminds me of the man who murdered both his parents, and then, when sentence was about to be pronounced pleaded for mercy on the grounds that he was an orphan."
"the trouble with a rat race is...once you win, you're still a rat"

so i walk into english class and the first thing our teacher says to us is "everyone should have a hobby. some people play golf. i dig up dead indians"
he's such a great teacher.

i hate people who think they're always right. like in the grand scheme of things....it doesn't matter what you know. you die anyway. "momento morti" remember that you must die. it's not depressing. it's realistic. i know nothing. that's not depressing either. im learning. that's the greatest thing ever. not in school. by talking to people. and asking way too many prodding questions. i love people who ask me questions i can't answer. i just keep asking other people. to see if there is anyone who knows anything
but there never will be. it takes a certain kind of person to laugh at themself or admit that they were wrong. or say that they know nothing. i guess im that kind of person. but i don't really know.
meanwhile. i dislike (not hate) people who think they know everything. this person keeps asking my problems and trying to fix the world. and they keep analyzing me. and the truth is...under all my glitz and bubbles and drama, im pretty simple. i don't have any problems. i go to a normal high school with abnormal friends (just like everyone else...think about that one for a sec. who's normal, right?) and i have a basic family....a dog. i don't exactly have the white picket fence...but i might as well be the american dream. and those people who think they're right are just as unknowing as the rest of us. people try and find the purpose of life. then they die. and they only have their "memory" and children to show that they were even there. so here's my final promise: when i go, there's gonna be a giant crator where i was. im gonna leave some big lasting impression that's like "whoa...what was that?" "that was liz, sayin' goodbye"
so there
(note: or i won't...i'll just die regularly. the end)

lalalalalalalaaa!!
so i woke up at exactly 9:26 this morning. i get up and walk downstairs. (i am in my aunt's house...and was sleeping in this huge bed on the top floor.) all of my family always wakes up early and so everyone was already gathered around the kitchen table with coffee, newspapers, and bagels. i'm not the biggest bagel fan...so i reach to the top of the refrigerator and grab some cereal. i get that and sit down. (note: i hadn't had much sleep...so everything was kinda fuzzy. speaking of fuzzy!! i bought fuzzy blue flip flops. ill wear them to school. anyway...back to my story...) so as im about to bring a spoonfull of rice krispies to my mouth, i distinctly hear them say "snap...... krackle..............FUCK YOU!"
yes well...i stole that story from mr. george carlin. and jared's car tapes. (yes i will give you back your cd's.)

so i went to dinner tonight with my "family"
i say that because some other random friends people were there.
but my mom's friends are really superficial and my mom told me before we left "wear something nice. like not what you usually wear" yes. so two of my mom's friends for like...a very long time were at the table (we were celebrating my dad's 50th birthday) and they just kept talking about makeup and hair and the miss america pageant. that made me sad
so i striked (struck?) up a conversation with the son of one of the friends. he's pretty cool. we got into a pretty interesting discussion because it turns out he sold candy and baseball cards at his school and he made like 150 dollars so his mom got him in a whole lot of trouble. and even though that's pretty corrupt...it's better than the miss america pageant. and i don't believe my mom had the nerve to invite her friends to my dad's birthday party. it doesn't make sense. my dad's pretty cool. and he sure doesn't like the miss america pageant. he's the one who's supposed to have a good time. not my mom. but im sure im just being odd and hypersensitive. so goodnight.

so...while david was in memphis...i ran out and bought a ...dun dun dun...
COWBOY HAT!!!
yay!
and yeeehaaaaaw!
so yees. im at my aunt's again.
and i came here through the metro and i was blowing bubbles on the metro. heheee...i love bubbles.
so yes.
see y'all later.

"I see dead people." So, Liz, that sounds pretty traumatic, but I'm sure you'll cope. (Get over it, LIZard.)

soooo...today in health these doctor/nurse/paramedic type people came in and talked to us about drunk driving. and they asked for a volunteer. so i became the "victim" they told me to close my eyes and be completely still. then they started speaking doctor speak ("STAT") and taping iv's onto my arms...and they put my neck in a neckbrace. and i couldn't see anything.
then i heard them having a conversation with my "parents" (also volunteers)
they explained how i had been in an accident and how i "didn't make it" but how they "did all they could do"
so then they yell "this one's over, let's bag and tag her" so they rip off all the iv tape (OUCH!) and take off the neckbrace. then one of them kinda rolls me to one side, and then the other...and then i hear a zipper!! and i open my eyes and IM IN A BODY BAG!! oh my goodness. that was scary.
then gabe kuperman asks "has that been used before?" and she says real calmly. "yeah close to 100 times."
AHHHHH! scary event of the day. oh my.

This week on Dawson's Creek... Okay, so Liz came over and we so totally bonded over an episode of the best show on Earth, Dawson's Creek. Liz and I will now become television buddies. We went and got Arby's and then hung out at a park again, but this time with David (her friend). David's mother got really scared because she didn't know where he was and she left a frightening message on my cellular phone. Oh well, everything worked out okay in the end.

Here's the deal-e-yo with this weekend. I'm about to go to work so that I can write a speech. Subsequently, with this I will speak at a rally in Memphis, Tennessee this Saturday around noon-ish. Furthermore, neither I nor anyone at work has any clue what this conference is actually about, which is counter-productive. So, I'm nervous 'cause there are going to be a lot of people there, but it will be an experience, regardless.

So, I will miss you all and hopefully I will be able to BLOG from afar, but I doubt it. Good luck and remember that the grass is always greener in Memphis, but people who go there don't give good closing statements to BLOG entries.

so...i took a list of everybody's names and there's close to 50 people in stage crew. that's way too many to be productive. i want to help and feel productive...but i just ended up washing paintbrushes. cause i wanted to do something. there's little to do...except walk around or do homework, or watch garrett make prank calls to arkansas. and then the poor lady keeps calling back...and she has to pay for the call cause it's a 1800 number. sad sad. wish i was cast. oh well. maybe in kiss me kate. wow. this wasn't supposed to be depressing...
oooh! on a lighter note! posters get picked up from the printers tomorrow....so wait until dark will have a poster!! yay!

did you know that if you rearrange the letters in "whole" you can spell "howl"
but you'd have an extra e
i don't know what you'd do with that.

hahahaa! joke:
what's the time called between slipping on a banana peel and smacking the pavement?
one BANANosecond.
heheee...
yes well...of to do some spanish worksheets!
adios!

Thanks again to SuperDense.

There's a hoe-down here. (Well, Liz has a picture if you scroll really far down.)

Okay- I'm sorry if you're religous, but sometimes- the naked truth comes out:
Jesus Christ, Pornstar

False Confesions:
If Liz is above the average woman, does that mean the average man is part of three-way with two lesbians? (not that Liz is a butch lesbian by night, or anything)
I like going to community pools. I am a stalker, I follow small little girls and- oh wait a second, just kidding.
Cowboys- highly overrated.
Thinking- even more overrated.
SuperDense's modifcation of Wally- entitled: "Why friends shouldn't let friends draw pictures for their webpage using paint."

if you saw two guys named hambone and flippy, which one would you think like dolphins the most? i'd say flippy, wouldn't you? you'd be wrong though. it's hambone.
True Story:
he was a cowboy, mister, and he loved the land. he loved it so much he made a woman out of dirt and married her. but when he kissed her, she disintegrated. later, at the funeral, when the preacher said "dust to dust," some people laughed, and the cowboy shot them. at his hanging, he told the others, "i'll be waiting for you in heaven--with a gun."

True Confessions:
i sincerely believe that people are, on the whole, useless.
it appalls me that the average woman would have sex with the average man.
i am the above average woman.
i also sincerely believe that if you go to a community pool and spend one single hour looking at people, you will share my disgust for humanity.
heheee..yes well...i need a cowboy hat. thank you. and goodnight.

yay! we have a wally now! hoooooray!
so anyway, i just saw the exorcist. don't go see it. it's bloody and gross..and it made me feel really sick...and it's a bad mooovie. im a cow. moooooooovie.
yes well.
alllllrighty roo!
off to make pancakes!

This beautimous picture was submitted by SuperDense.

Yay! I finally got into Wally, he has been blocking me all day! Here is a conversation Liz and I had about it.

David: It's not letting me on.
Liz: on wally??
David: Yes.
David: It will not let me Wally.
Liz: oh my..it wouldn't let me either..
Liz: uh-oh
David: NOOOO!
David: What will happen to our two heroes if the cannot Wally?
Liz: i don't know......it's a conspiracy!!
David: We- we- we will whither up and- and- and-
David: BECOME PRUNES!
Liz: ahhhhhhhhh
Liz: not the prunification
David: Prunification awaits us, we should not resist.
David: Let us prepare- to the bathtub, Liz!
David: In other conditions, I'm against dual bathing, but given the circumstances...
David: Maybe I can get into wally if I built a large wooden rabbit.
Liz: right. and then ill jump out and throw confetti and yell "surprise"
Liz: but im over here...how could i jump out of the rabbit?
David: You dolt!
Liz: well...maybe if we build a giant hedgehog...
David: [boing] Run away!
Liz: giant flying bovine!!
Liz: heheee...it's yom kippur, and im not supposed to be eating....
Liz: yup, i just had a giant bowl of oatmeal..hehee
David: I'm engaged to oatmeal.
Liz: and cheese
Liz: and me
David: Yeah.

"Stools are cool, everybody wants a stool or two. It's the rule! Everyone wants a stool! Stool Boom! From the parlor to the pool room! Everyone knows our name!"
thanks gabe.
and
"neuticle, neuticle, they're good for your heart, the more you eat the more you neuticle."

don't go here if you're really religious
yes. daniel sent me that. it's hilarious. heheee...

interesting concept of the day: perception. example:
you see this writing as black.
so let's say someone saw that writing as black
but as you can see, what we all see as red, this person has been known to call that certain color black. intewesting...
yes well...if that didn't hurt your brain...how about this one
"if your mind was simple enough to understand it, it'd be so simple you couldn't understand it after all."

Okay- Liz's night of dancing, forlic, and fun will in no way ever compare to the time I had last night. Allow me to set the scene: I was semi-depressed, 'cause I wasn't going to homecoming. Well, I remembered my friend's improv group, RATS, was performing at some old Heckinger's in DC. So- being the depressed patron that I am, I meandered my way down there, but as I entered the run down building and looked inside, I realized that it had been furnished as a modern art gallery. There was photography, sculptures, film, paintings, drawings, charchols... it was incredible. So, I sat down and watched the show, which, as always, provided me with an ear-to-ear smile. After the show, I hung out with Leo and his friends. He bought me a glass of wine, and then I just got to talk to all these intellectual people, who were awesome. It was so amazing to talk to these people who were like social equals. I even got to meet this film guy who totally refreshed why I wanted to go into film. He said that if he started doing another project that he would include me somehow. Then there was also this awesome painting that I could not even begin to describe, but next week I'm going to model for an arm.

So- if anyone wants to go and have an extrodinary time, the gallery is called the Art-O-Matic and is located right at Tenlytown-AU Metro Station, 4500 Wisconsin Avenue, NW of Washington, DC.

im at my aunt's house again...
homecoming was soooo much fun!!!
but the best part was the bubble machine! heheee...they played a whole bunch of like techno music and we tangoed to it. tangoed...the past tense of Tango. like the dance. yes. i did a line dance!!! heheee...

SO david.... ewwww to your little picture guy.
anyway, here comes homecoming! i hate nail polish...but my sister convinced me to paint my nails...i have one finger done. proscrastination is the key to getting my way out of it...heheee..
i feel like one of those people in the movies that's like "i have to take a shower" and somebody's like "you have like 6 hours until you have to leave" and the person starts getting ready...it's like 4 and i have to get to amelias by 6. yes. that's why im here. wasting time...ok we'll see how this turns out.
bye bye! off to dance the night away!

Today was the AIDS Walk. Amy, David (another one), Lauren and I walked like 2 miles for the cause. It was really short this year and we were bored so then we went to the Silver Dinner. Now- I want to have everyone's opinion on something. I think Dwight White is cute, but I'm getting a lot of "Ew"s, so here ya go:

So- have you realized that most of our BLOGs start with "so"? No one has drawn a Wally yet. Arg!

oh i forgot something!! i sang the national anthem at the homecoming football game!! (not by myself...but it's sounds impressive, doesn't it?) so im proud. goodnight again!

so anyway...i just came home from the silver diner...we ate some food...
yes. and jocelin and i sent the posters for wait until dark to the printers!! yay! it'll be good, cause we get them next week and then we get to post them all over and have fun asking random people to come to our show! so yeah...and im lisa! so come see me. ill be hanging around somewhere..hehehee...maybe in a closet. yay! and tonight was homecoming game, and we lost of course, but i saw a bunch of graduated people...
and tomorrow's the dance! im gonna have me some fun. ok then. im going to go to bed then..goodnight!

So- Liz and I hung out today, after rehearsal, and went to Stapples to buy fun things. However, due to some narcotics grown in David's (other one) fermented pickles, she was looser than a sawed-off shuttlecock. We went to the park and ate Arby's (we got fat, but it was okay, because we watched other people burn our fat for us), then we tried to cross the creek, but didn't, and then we went on the swing set and I kicked off my shoes. All the time, there was an odd remninse of Kevin Spacey that hung in the air like wafting elephant dung. Then, I drove Liz home and came to my home to the realization that my parents are leaving in 20 hours for Orlando. Both fo them are leaving. Leaving the house to me. Me, as in, I.

Anyway- my mother just tried to teach my how to smoke, but it was so nasty that I decided to put it off until later. It was really, really, really, really quite disgusting. You see, in addition to a mind-numbing stage kiss and getting hit and hit and hit and hit, I also have to smoke a cigarette. (By the way, come see the show- I'm the only guy character who gets play!)

Just in case you're curious what the hell Liz is talking about, here is a prior conversation:

Liz: yay! im about to...but it's kinda....deep and stuff...so ill make it short
David: Deep?
Liz: like....almost profound...
Liz: like not quite shallow.....but standing knee-deep in thought
David: Should I get the water-wings, just in case you wade in a bit further?
Liz: yeeeeeeeeees

hey! im a good dead girl, david! im lisa, the dead girl. i hang in a closet...and im good at it. and everyone will come watch me play my part as lisa the dead girl. and they'll clap. and blow bubbles. elephant dung?? ewwwwwwwww david....just ewwwwwwwwwwwww.

so i started thinking about friends and stuff...and how like this is all pretty new to me. everyone really. nobody really knows how to behave...they follow what everyone else does..and hope they don't offend someone who's really hypersensitive. i suppose im hypersensitive...and melodramatic....and insecure...all the characteristics that american teenagers hold near and dear to their hearts...and it's all relative...who is it that is so stable that they can judge other people...or is it the un (in?) stable that judge people...to make themselves feel better? are people only happy when they are the happiest and everybody else is miserable? is that how high school is supposed to work? how life is supposed to work? life doesn't have a purpose....or maybe its purpose is to find the purpose. or maybe the purpose is to join a band and play the kazoo while blowing bubbles through the kazoo. and go to homecoming and dance through flowers....or on top of tables while throwing flowers. yes. so that was almost deep. im standing knee-deep in thought. somebody get the water wings!

While Liz was busy galvanized her life experience into watching popcorn kernels fall like elephant dung out of a child's mouth, I was preoccupied by something much more important- Dawson's Creek. For the entire summer, I have had a screwed up life due to my lack of Dawson's Creek guidance. In the end, this televsion show will have more influence on what college I go to than my college counseler will. It even reseolved my homecoming drama. I just need to meet some guy who pretends he doesn't know English and take him to homecoming. Or, I could take my ex-best friend's big sister. Or, my boyfriend could go to boarding school four hours away and I could just go with my gay best friend- wait a second....

So- I was thinking today (which is a bad habit), and I realized that not only am I not going to graduate high school, but that it really hurts to get smacked on the head several times. In S*T*A*G*E today, Ms. Mac decided we should run the part of Scene II where I get hit a lot. So, "Oh her. Yes. She went ahead to get a seat in the back." Swoosh, miss, swoosh, miss. "Nowhere near." Babush! (ka) And that's when I got a brain hemerage. Thanks Amy! At least I'm not playing the dead girl.

ya. so i tried to make a picture of wally...but obviously it didn't work. so im writing here instead. it's actually like 9:30, but the computer will say it's like 3. so i just came back from babysitting..we were watching a movie and eating popcorn...and this little kid takes every single one of those little unpopped kernel things from the bottom of the bowl and sticks them in his mouth....and he starts spitting each one very slowly back in the bowl. kids. fun. yes.

So- today, there were seven people in my car. How odd is that, here was the setup: Denise, Dan, Mike in the back with Anh on top, and Jake riding shotgun, Liz riding Jake. Eventually the all got home, but in my rush to get out of Richard Montgomery High School, I may have inevitably caused irreversable damage to the underneath of my car. Oops, oh well. Then, I went to this god awful meeting at MCPS Central Offices and it was totally lame. So uhm- yay. I love the word yay.
You know what else I love? Cheesefries. Oh wait, some of you do not as of yet know what cheesefries are. You will learn, in due time. Liz and I are freaks of nature and have an entire code that revolves around ordering food at the Silver Diner.

you know those people who walk infront of you in the hallway and just stop right in front of you? i'll be walking all nice like and these people in front of me will see someone they know and just have to stop and say "hi".....you can say hi while you're moving!! it can be done! i promise! some random comedian once said that stupid people should have to wear signs. maybe if they did, i'd be smart enough to not walk behind them in the hallway. you know...like a big eye-catching purple poster board thingy that said "im stupid, don't talk to me!" that way i'd know...but then it wouldn't be as fun to make fun of them...so the next time you see someone stop in the hallway...just give them a little nudge...or blow bubbles at them...maybe that way they'll remember that there are other people in the hallway. yes. thank you and goodnight! ya. and somebody buy me a cowboy hat! that thing was sooo much fun today! yeeeehaaa!
and watch out carlo...im bringing bubbles to homecoming!! and wings...and ill see if i can round up a crown! so...yes. and im writing a one-act with daveeed. it'll be good. so come see that tooooo. it's a parody of some old british literature...
bloomp.

i sat on someone on the ride home!!! sorry jake...
oooh yeah!! and i moooved stuff today at crew! im helpful i promise!
let me tell ya' - montesquieu...he's a cool guy. hurray for government. and nsl class. grrr. i've finished chapter 1. out of 4. i have a test. i left my bubbles in my locker...
ooooh yeah!! and guess what all you wst-ers who said id never get anywhere with my music!! well guess what?? im in a band! and i play the kazoo! that's right...im the second chair kazooer in a band! a real band. oooooh! so there! we have a whole kazoooooo section! soo... BABUSH! (ka)

Well, Liz demanded that I posted something tonight, so here I am! It's been such an interesting day of sitting here, alone in my house. And I've finally decided- well, I'm okay with being single. Even so, I'm going to watch the Bachelor thing on Fox right now- yay!

hahaa..i like crayons!
oh yeah, and im lisa in my play! i got a part. so everybody come and see! cause i get a dramatic death scene! and im like on every crew...so when the lights and stuff don't work, you can be in the audience saying "that was probably liz trying to be important" yeah. so come to wait until dark. and wear t-shirts that say "i luv liz" in really pretty letters. that would make me happy! and buy me roses. heheee..
oh yes. and i found this website that's really funny...it has all the stupid stuff that bush says on it...cause he's a stupidhead. yes. so visit bushisms and make fun of republicans! heheee...
and don't pee in my pants david.

ok so i found this cute little website thingy where there's this little baby you can play with!! and if you move your mouse..he follows it and tries to catch it...and if you wait long enough, the little baby starts sucking his toe...and he's really cute..and i think he's supposed to be selling toothpaste or something, but he's cute anyway, so go to little baby hehee...
and maybe if you aren't as easily entertained as me...maybe you'll like these pictures
ok well...that's enough for now...just remember always get crayons when you go into a restaurant...and draw on the table and see if the waitor notices...the end

Liz: you don't actually draw with crayons onto things- you color other crayons with crayons when you go to resteraunts. Do you know why? It's because you are a freak of nature. A natural freak, you understand? I feel the need to pee. May I pee on you, Liz?

Well, Liz, since you asked, all day long I have been at Montgomery Pride. Yes, I was mingling with other homosexuals who reside in Montgomery County. And- now I'm being pulled to some event Tuesday night at MCPS Central Ofices. Leaving me (brief calculation) exactly no time in which do my homework! Oh well, who needs homework when you can save the world?

This is for you Liz: I have to push the pram-a-lot.

So- otherwise this has been a mostly uneventful and I am still without a date to homecoming. C'est la vie, is my motto, though. Tonight is such a hectic night, I have to eat, have a conference call, reply to a bunch of e-mails, write a Reformation paper, start writing a huge research paper, read things from a book I don't have and fill out a worksheet, study for a law test, and.. stop BLOGING! Did I mention, that whilst doing this I must remain....

Absolutely Fabulous!

happy october! ok so it turns out that the slogan "got milk?" was translated into a bunch of different languages...and in spanish the direct translation is "are you lactating?"
and in chinese, pepsi's "come alive with the new generation" campaign means "pepsi will bring your ancestors back from the dead"
hurray for advertisements

i just realized that it's sunday morning...and im awake....and last night was saturday night...and i was home, on the computer, blogging.....so....the lesson to be learned? everybody invite me to things because im a loser!! yay. yes well...where are you david? and where is a wally? somebody draw a wally....please...and send me fun websites that will keep me entertained for a while.
and, as bush said "i know how hard it is to put food on your family." let that be a lesson to all of you!
goodnight.

ok, did you know you can use a kazoo as a bubble wand? recipe for fun: dip it in the bubble soapy goop stuff and play a tune! but blow out and don't inhale, cause that would be a disaster...
and bake me a blog! draw me a wally! that would make my day brighter! thank you!

ten tips for a slimer, shaplier, sexier blog!
hurray! well, i haven't written in a while...but i've had some pretty interesting things to say recently
Lizzybee4: "i don't remember my name..."
ya, well i said that to david...i've had an interesting couple of days. my aunt just came out of the hospital after having some major surgery...and i really hate hospitals...i've been in them so many times, but just to visit people, i've never been seriously sick or anything. they always smell old and like medicine and plastic and stuff. i don't like them. and my mom's been giving me kind of a hard time about not being "jewish enough" but she really can't tell me any of that, because she married someone who was catholic! she didn't go to rosh hashanah services...but she gave me a hard time about not wanting to go. and as daniel says "i can't believe in a god who would have the nerve to make me an athiest." so whatever my actual view on judaism...i just don't want my mom giving me such a hard time about everythin. and on a lighter note: i have another elephant joke! how do you know there are 4 elephants in your refrigerator? there is a taxi waiting outside.
ok so...the rest of my blogs will be short and cute...oh yeah! and draw me a wally!

how do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator?
there are blue tennis shoes outside the door

in kansas it's illegal to shoot rabbits from a motorboat...

well, i just got an email from a friend and it turns out some states have some really weird laws. did you know that in california, it is a crime to shoot at any animal from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale and that women aren't allowed to drive in house coats....that's a whoa there if i ever heard one...

There has been minimal BLOGification today, Liz. Why have you not been using Wally to his full extent? Oh- I know why! It's because we do not as of yet know what Wally looks like! I am hereby ordering- the official Wally-Drawing CONTEST!
{Gigilo Chant plays in the background of David's announcement}

All submissions may be sent to David(dmuma3@aol.com) or Liz(checkersb@aol.com) or may be put in their hands. Wally may be no higher than seven inches, and no fatter than five inches. He may not be weilding any violent weapon or any type of female tampoon thing. No nudity, nor definete sex. Drawings of Liz and I making out will also be accepted, however, we will not pose.

Thank you.

how do you know when an elephant is visiting your house?
when there's a taxi outside with three elephants in it.

Liz- what is it with you and this Elephant fetish? It's starting to worry me.

How many elephants can you fit in a taxi?
Four (one next to the driver and three in back).

hey there, i got sent this site in the mail. you can take a presidential poll by throwing pies in bush's or gore's face!! hours of fun!! sooooo...go there!! and make a movie out of it and call your self a stooge! heheee!
pie poll!

Wow- today, I was driving Liz home and there was a car accident- right in front of me- so of course, I was freaking out. Liz and I were going to get our hair cut together, but the traumatic experience rendered us with no hair at all. Yep, we're bald. Hear that, Liz's hot homecoming date-? She has no hair, she is a grotesque demon. Demon I tell you! So, yes, it was frightening.
Happy birthday Jared. Thanks for telling Liz that this was our flirt site, it has given her a big swollen head, which looks even worse now that she has no hair. And we all know that the only reason Wally, Liz and myself incorporated is because Wally and I want to get in Liz's pants. It's all a master scheme.
Okay- so I'm majorly pressed for this guy on the Cheerleading Squad named David, he is so cute and adorable, but he's probably heterosexual, just like every other guy in our school. Oh well, just had to post that.
There were a lot of people at crew today, but they seemed to be causing more problems than being productive. I have no problem with having a large and productive STAGE family, but people really do have to learn to be respecting, that's all I'm saying.

click here even though anh probably already showed you all this

ok so...i don't have much to say...except IM SCARED! the musical is kiss me kate, and i don't know much about it or anything, but i just really want a part. more than like anything in the world. right. so ...that would make me really happy! oh yeah...and my birthday is in november and i want everyone to make me mix-tapes of music!! because i like music, but i have none...you here that, muma? make me a mix tape...heheheeee...oh yeah! and happy birthday jared! heheee...he's like over the hill now, so we all have to send him mix tapes also...except i already owe him a couple o' cds...so yes...give me music!! and sing to me!! i luv you all...

ok so, there's a tv show called "sponge-bob-square-pants" that's the greatest thing ever!! who knew...

Liz, why do you have no life? Don't you have homework or something to that extent? Well, just for your weird line of onamatopeas, I will reply with a song. That's right a song!

{A parody of "Look at Me, I'm Sandra Dee" from Grease}
Look at me, I'm Lizzy Bee,
Full of all but ignorancy,
I won't pass my class, I'll just fall on my ass,
It's great, I'm Lizzy Bee!

Watch it, hey I need some play,
The last guy I had kissed was gay,
I won't go too far, I'll stop at the bar,
Too find me some guy, yay!

I don't walk or run, I just want some fun,
I get liquid shit everyday,
If you tie your tubes, you can see my boobs,
They'll grown in fully by May.

As for you, you skankachu,
I know who you wanna do,
Bathing's a must if you've got so much lust,
Stay far away from my moo!

zoom zoom zap zizzle zoop wang wonka woodle noodle dang dip dooda day bang boom bah rang ring whooooopeeeee!!!
so ha!

Why did the chicken cross the road?


Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed, I've not been told!
- Dr. Seuss

are you saying i have lice?

This one's for you, LIZard:
{To the tune: "Santa Claus is Coming to Town"}
Well, they're making a list,
Checking it twice,
You won't get ca-ast if you've got lice;
None of us are getting called back.

Why are you here?
It's pointless to stay,
You're not gonna make it anyway;
None of us are getting called back.

They know you're a bad actor,
They know you really suck,
You haven't any talent friend,
All you've got is plain bad luck.

So you should try your luck,
At Walmart, my dear,
You're not making STA-AGE until next year;
None of us are getting called back.

You don't want to be,
In this show anyway,
After all the only hot guy is gay,
None of us getting, no none us are getting

Well, that's right, none of us are getting called back!

{To the song, "Little Old Lady From Pasedena"}
Little Old Lady who wants Zucchini... (go lady, go lady, go lady- go)
She won't leave town without a supena-ee... (go lady, go lady, go lady- go)
Thinks that Mr. T is a big ol' meanie... (go lady, go lady, go lady- go)
She's just a Little Old Lady who wants Zucchini!

Okay, enough of that!

whenever somebody talks to me online they end up saying "lol" which they think means laugh out loud. but whenever i see it i think "little old lady" which totally screws with half the things people say...

David: "Was not that Hue Morris?"
Liz: "haha...he's my best friend...hue morris"
David: "Shut up wench, I'm your best friend."
Liz: "ok.."
Liz: "maybe you're name's hue morris"
David: "No more of your insolance!"
Liz: "yes sir.."
More proof that Liz and I are freaks of nature, and the fact that I coded that IM message into Wally. Wally needs more personality, don't you agree? How about we have someone draw us a Wally. That's it! A Wally-Drawing Contest!

i love it when people say stuff like
something has "turned up missing"
it makes me happy and i just laugh at them and walk away. then i turn around and see the puzzled expression on their face and laugh even more.
im so evil
mwahahahahahahaaa!

I've decided that I'm going to sell water in a can. Bottled water is great, but aluminum is so much better than plastic. It would keep the water oh so much colder and there would not be as much volume as a bottle, resulting in a higher quanitity sale. Or I could just sell dehydrated water in a can.

watch out alex and amelia!! anh and i are going to raid the costume closet and find poofy dresses and make bubble wands!! so ha!

Now that Liz and I have discovered colors and styles, there will be no stopping us. LIZard, Muma-UGH & Wally Associates will prevail as victors in the grand scheme and journey that is life. You cannot stop us! We are all powerful!
So- I'm supposed to go to a meeting at 3pm today, but I'm not certain if it exists. I will go anyway, and see what happens. If it is not there, well, then, oh well, these things happen frequently.

why do elephants float in water ?

so they don't get they're tennis shoes wet

just seeing if this works...

Yes, thank you, that capatalization will be sufficent. Oh, yes, Wait Until Dark is this year's play. I have the role of Sam the husband of Susy. I also am a former Marine, which just goes to show you: Our school does not type-cast parts. Well, since you all know I'm studly (I was Sir Studley is Once Upon a Mattress), you will all simply have to come. Thank you. By the way, Liz, this should be a different color. Is it? It is, good. Ask me later, Liz, I will teach you how to make things Red, Green, and Blue. Purple sometimes, perhaps? Maybe.

i hate capitalized letters!! grrr...well this afternoon i am off to find a homecoming dress for like no money, because as david posted before, i am a hobag. and that justifies everything. ok so it's never too early to start advertising sooo COME SEE WAIT UNTIL DARK! (there, is that enough capatilization fer ya' ?)

Liz-what kind of heads have you been biting into where there's crisp juiciness? Anyhow. Good morning, BLOG fanatics. I am up way too early (rather, I've been up now for some time, I previously did wake up quite early- so early that in fact, I was considering it to be early). Liz- just me being curious, but did your shift key break, or are you just not capable of capatalizing your letters? C'est La Vie.

Liz is a hobag.

In conclusion, I would like to say: "Quack."

thanks soooooo much to denise for her lovely and skilled photography, anh for....being anh...., hannah for her jokes, and jeremy...for the head...

As I bit into the nectarine, it had a crisp juiciness about it that was very pleasurable--until I realized it wasn't a nectarine at all, but A HUMAN HEAD.

Here are the major contributers to this BLOG. The left one is David, the right one is Liz. It's hard to tell because Liz has no boobs and David is a queen. Yes, they are holding each others butts. Yes, David is a homosexual. No, Liz is not actually a lesbian, contrary to popular belief.

(And, I have no clue who that lady is, we are not associated with her in any way shape or tangible form.)

Shoes smell like feet. The Renaissance festival is for fun, it's often not realistic. It's kinda like pancakes. PANCAKES. Okay, well that was an inside joke, hey- how about this? If you had to choose bewteen glow in the dark genetalia or to burst into an orgasm each time you heard the word pancake, which would you choose? Liz and I have an answer, that's why we eat at IHOP. YES!

let's not get me started on homecoming. thank ye. you know the cute little people at the renisance festival have to say thank ye? instead of thank you? but they can wear modern jewelry and shoes? go figure....

You know Andre, he's large, he wears cordoroy, he's taking Isabelle to Homecoming...
Speaking of sporks, I mean, school dances. I have no date to Homecoming because

Liz left me for a much hotter guy.

I'm not bitter though, I love Liz. I'm going to marry Liz and- oh wait a second... nevermind.

who's andre?

whoever coined the phrase, "now then, where were we?" that is possibly the most confusing question ever. if anyone was indeed ever to figure out whether the person meant exactly "now" or "then" chances are both people would not have been in the same place at both those times!! go figure...

Andre: "I think that the shoppin cart was actualy the brains behind the action"
David: "Oh god."
Liz, should I start ignoring Andre now, or let him ramble a bit longer?

Andre: "what i want to know, is how in the world did they get sucked into the street sweeper?"
Questions are also welcome here at MLW Associates. I would say that the woman was just plain stupid, the child, a conformist, and the shopping cart, an innocent bystander. The real question is: How does one become a street-sweeper operator?

Andre: "your last post is sick and twisted"
Thank you for the feedback, always appreciated here at Muma-UGH, LIZard, and Wally Associates.
I love America, I'm going to marry America, and move to France. After all, they gave us that statue-mabob, right?

this is kinda crazy how we're posting every minute...but im enjoying myself.
meanwhile, while the mother, child, street-sweeper, and shopping cart incedent was taking place, a whole bunch of farmers in the midwest decided to choreograph a complete do-si-do-ing line dance while on their tractors.
that's news for you.
and a man tried to sue himself.
god bless america

Liz, you know you just sweat me like a pig on Friday because I got the totally hot guy and you got cold cheesefries. No wait, I lied, no cheesefries for you. I was reading today and there was apparently this woman who, with her child, was sucked into a street-sweeper in DC. The child and a shopping cart remained intact whilst the woman took 5 hours to come out. She was dead. This is sick, twisted, and I can't believe I stiffle to chuckle at it.
I left the Turkey Burgers at SuperDense's house. Whoops.

{enter theme music: "The Flight of the Bumblebee"}
I like cheese, don't you Liz? Someday, I'm going to marry cheese and move to France and have eighteen children with holes in them that will speak French and say: "Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled like FEET."

ok david, you can have the old drunk guys. cheers.
and as some monty python member most likely repeated from somebody else at sometime: "SPAM"

why do elephants live in heards?

to get wholesale reductions on blue tennis shoes.

Well- beware readers- a new force has entered and it is called: Muma- UGH.
Liz and I have decided to share this BLOG because we are together, the Corn Flakes.
Don't say that I didn't warn you, we are freaks of nature.
Liz, what is green and has wheels?
(by the way, the 20-year-olds were checking ME out)

for those few cabaret peoples out there:
there was this perfectly marvelous squirrel on this really incredible day and it happily managed to work it's way under my car, now there's this perfectly wonderful squirrel and it's perfectly oozingful guts, and they're both squashed together and having a marvelous time!
from david
sing it out loud...it's more fun that way

Why do elephants wear blue tennis shoes?

Because the white ones get dirty too fast.

ok so im going to post again...even though i just did...i love this thingy! and bubbles. i love bubbles too. so a whole bunch of people went to ruby tuesday's last night (cause it was the only place w/out a wait) and we were sitting next to these random 20-some year olds...like all the old wst-ers. and david wants me to say that they were checking us out. so when we left i blew bubbles at them. i love bubbles.

lalalalalaaa!! so...i don't really know why this is called wally...oh well.
whenever my sister gets a magazine...(which is quite often..) i always steal the little samples of perfume...i've noticed that the scents keep getting worse and worse...what's happening to the world that the perfume samples don't smell good anymore? and then there are those little ladies who try and squirt you with perfume each time you walk into a department store...scary stuff...
oh and THANKS ANH! i luv you for helping me make this page...because im incompetent...especially with computers...so thanks.

yay! this does work! well then...i just gotta say this is my silly attempt at keeping a journal-type thing. everybody has always given me journals as presents, and i fill up the first 2 pages and stop. so maybe ill remember to write in this...
so anyway hello!! maybe one of these days, i'll think of something witty to write, but until then...adios!

maybe this one will work....

hello there..just seeing if it works..